Recently, on social media, an NLP Practitioner asked a question about a client who reported having a phobia, and with whom he used the NLP Fast Phobia Cure, which may have partly worked, but it came back a few days later?
Mirroring Breathing for Profound NLP Rapport - NLP Article
One of the things we study in NLP is how to get deeper rapport with people, which helps you more effectively click with absolutely anybody. NLP is probably the source of most great rapport training available.
This includes methods for establishing or getting rapport initially, building or enhancing or deepening rapport, maintaining rapport over time, and then, when the time comes, elegantly reducing rapport so as to disconnect from a situation, but still maintaining the relationship.
Now, this may seem counter intuitive, if you still think "But there are just some people I click with, and some I don't." NLP trained people don't have that problem. We can click with anyone, if we so choose. And here's one of the most profound ways of doing so:
Mirroring and Matching others' breathing rates can produce amazing results.
One of the things we noticed when studying people who were naturally in extremely deep rapport, is that their breathing tends to synchronize. So if you synchronize your breathing, you can rapidly CAUSE the same feelings in another person that they would feel if they were already likely to gain rapport with you.
In fact, if you synchronize your breathing and speaking rates with other people's breathing rates, you're going to have a blast watching and enjoying as people find ways to deepen their connection with you in response!
However, often when just getting started, some people have experienced some difficulty with mirroring some other people. To do this well requires really good peripheral vision. This is one of the hallmarks of great NLP training, is if the trainer spends time improving their students' peripheral awareness skills (I do. Always.).
Train Your Peripheral Vision Awareness
If you can learn to pay attention to the big picture by using more of your peripheral vision, and slow down your perceptions -- since you're not looking for rapid changes usually -- you can begin to notice the slow rise and fall of her arms... and maybe the outward and inward expansion of her rib cage ... or her arms resting against her rib cage or stomach... sometimes the shoulders will adjust a little or rise with each breath... maybe then you can even... learn to see changes in the wrinkles of clothing, or in the muscles in her cheeks or neck....
And as you get better and better at learning and then using these skills, you'll probably find that mirroring breathing exactly can sometimes be noticed by really perceptive people, so you'll want to become more subtle as you learn to cross mirror (like tapping your finger on your thigh or chest or tapping your feet to the rhythm of her breathing, or the blinking of her eyes...
It reminds me of how, whenever people meet out somewhere socially, and... well, have you ever seen how couples react to one another and pay attention, really pay attention to how other people move? It's almost as though they can really begin to do similar things without thinking about it, in natural, comfortable ways! Sometimes they're in sync, sometimes they're out of sync... and the conversations always flow more naturally, more comfortably, when they are in sync!
What's more, in a way, many people who are out of sync can get into sync by doing similar things, and if they're really really tuned in to the person they're hearing from and talking with, they or the other person can go off in one direction verbally, or nonverbally, and the other might just follow along... now, as you think about all these things, and find a way to see how you can utilize everything this email has to offer, instantly, for wonderful purposes, and all for having fun and living a great life, how surprised would you be when, if you actually did get caught, and then you laughed about it, they might be so in tune with you, that they'd laugh along with you?
OK, Now you might want to wake up and go out & try it all out with your eyes open!!! So, you can see for yourself how! Totally incredible? It is!
In terms of going beyond this... consider integrating all these skills deeply, learning how important the process of influence truly is, and most importantly, IMHO, how using these new skills responsibly becomes all the more important, as you increase the effectiveness of your own skills!
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- Knowledge Engineering (& Belief Craft) have evolved, into GeniusMapping™
- As of September 2020, we're in the process of moving from Tampa, Florida, to the Youngstown Ohio area. Currently, during the Coronavirus era, we're mostly focusing on Zoom-based Coaching, and aligning resources to run online courses.
- How "Civil Engineering" totally reframes the word "Stress," redefines the phrase "Stress Management," and leads us to embrace Stress!
- Many NLP Practitioners are more sloppy with their thinking patterns, than they'd like to admit, or... would even notice.
- Watch NLP Co-Founder Richard Bandler use NLP to eliminate Michael Strahan's phobic response to snakes -- in minutes (with Kelly Ripa bringing over a BIG snake at the end to test Michael's response). Spoiler alert: It worked ridiculously well.
- No matter what skill you want to learn, no matter what fears or concerns or hesitation you may have, there are and will always be a wide range of approaches, to learning that skill. It's important to keep that in mind when making learning choices.
- Many more famous people have been trained in Ericksonian (indirect) Hypnosis and NLP than you might guess. There are certainly far more who have strong interests here than have publically admitted so.
- On January 1, 2015, Jonathan Altfeld and 20 other co-authors released a digital book entitled "Creating Business Growth."
- What are the Four Stages of Learning?
- Mark HenryCertified Hypnotherapist, Baton Rouge, LABought Video : “Building Hypnotic Rapport”
Jonathan's skill builders DVDs are incredible. Learn about building hypnotic rapport by pacing and leading others breathing patterns. I synchronized my breathing with several attractive women at coffee shops and malls in the last month. Each turned their bodies toward me while I sat across a room. They gazed at me for several seconds. I felt that I connected with them on an unconscious level. I later spoke with them and were amazed at their friendliness to a complete stranger.
2005 - Bob DillonSeminar Leader, VermontAttended Course : Speaking Ingeniously
No matter where you perceive your skill level, there is always more. Jonathan not only cuts diamonds, he polishes them, and adds more facets."
2002 - Ted VanderNootCognitrix, London, UKAttended Course : Belief Craft MP3 Set
"Your presentation of AI & Knowledge Engineering & how computer software systems can learn & decide was quite interesting. But using these models to then explore modelling in the NLP context was mind-blowing! It was really cool how well we were tracking beliefs by only the second day. [...] Not only could we track beliefs & language patterns "on the fly" but we could unravel their interconnections & their interactions conversationally. I thoroughly recommend your course to anyone who wants to improve their skills at tracking language patterns & modelling."
http://www.cognitrix.com/2005 - Elaine ChristakosFinancial Coach, Kelowna, BCAttended Course : Linguistic Wizardry
Jonathan is a superb trainer and communicator. I am thrilled to have participated in his recent Seattle Linguistic Wizardry workshop. Jonathan has a way of transferring knowledge with such ease as to include everyone - regardless of prior training or NLP experience. I was in awe watching how Jonathan managed to reach everyone in a different way - while constantly keeping the entire group engaged. I've now got a renewed excitement for practicing my NLP skills, and am more eager than ever to keep it working for me. Although I thought my coaching calls were great prior to attending LW, soon after my training - I found my calls to be more fluid and effective. The words seemed to flow much easier and my use of embedded commands are more natural and useful. I also am better able to focus my attention on understanding the style of my clients patterns - without losing focus on the content of what I'm teaching. It has all been such a natural process that I'm eager to see where it will be most effective next.
2007 - G.A.Sydney, AustraliaBought Audio : Finding Your Irresistible Voice
After reviewing your CDs I started realising how applicable it was in creating a new improved voice range. I realised that with very little effort people were listening attentively to me, even in crowded places and in places where machinery is constantly running. My workmates noticed it too, dropping comments as to how 'agreeable' it was to listen to my opinions, and how much more rapport was noticeable! My new girlfriend also refers to my voice as to one of my good qualities, which -- in combination with my other NLP techniques -- makes for my voice a seductive weapon of choice. I am recommending it to my friends. Thanks!
2004 - Chris ArellanoNorth CarolinaAttended Course : NLP Practitioner Training
Through this experience, I've gathered many things that I did not have before. I am able to see things, and see them from new perspectives. I have learned and am still learning how to improve both myself as well as those with whom I come in contact. Things I have just described are somewhat vague in description yet very profound to me. I owe much of this trance-formation to Jon for providing the tools and facilitating the use of these new tools in a positive direction. Thank you.
1998 - Chris FialaMarketing Consultant, Clearwater, FLAttended Course : Speaking Ingeniously
"I very much enjoyed your seminar. Having more comfort when I talk with people makes the rapport deeper. Even though my demo is only 90 seconds, I hold longer eye contact with more potential customers, building a sense of connection. Result? Sales of my juicer product increased 30%." -
- Andrew JoyPrincipal French Horn, Cologne Radio Orchestra, Cologne, GermanyBought Audio : Finding Your Irresistible Voice
Your CDs arrived safe and sound. I've listened to the first two and worked on the exercises. I'm a 55 year young, professional principal french horn player and have been working in a top German symphony orchestra for the past 30 years. I listened to the bonus telephone interview today. I am blown away. The results, applying your voice exercises to my playing (and to my students) are phenomenal. Resonance plays a huge role in performing on a brass instrument and very few poeple understand much about it. I've picked up useful and practical information, from singers and voice coaches, that I've been able to adapt to brass playing. Explaining resonance is now easy using your nose, mouth, throat etc, approach. The killer though, is using double resonance. I have free at present and don't have to perform in the orchestra (and the hall) until the beginning of Febuary. However, I am itching to hear how my changed sound is in our hall. It has to be amazing. Your material has added wonderfully valuable understandings to my comprehension of what constitutes excellent quality brass player and has beautifully simplified my means of effectively communicating it to my students. There has been a lot of belly laughter, stunned ears and broad smiles in my teaching studio this week. I'm teaching a course to amateur wind and brass players next year and am looking forward to applying your teachings to this particular situation for the benefit of the people attending. Thanks a million. This is one of the few times in my life where I've been gladly reeling and with a huge smile on my face.
http://www.andrewjoy.com2007 - Maureen StevensonCafe Manager, Nottingham, UKAttended Course : Belief Craft MP3 Set
"As a person who has never attended any NLP or KE Sessions before, I have found the whole experience useful to me and feel that I am going away with a wealth of knowledge I believe will guide me through many areas of my life. I am excited about attending more trainings in the future."
2005 - Howard WolfMiami, FLAttended Course : Persuasion Summit
PTPS was absolutely the best training in persuasion I've ever experienced. Chris' skills in NLP and persuasion are a compilation of the best of Richard Bandler, Kenrick Cleveland, & Michael Hall, all combined. Chris has evolved these techniques, enhanced them, and repackaged persuasion for the new millenium. Chris has tested his techniques thousands of times through the thousands of telemarketers he's managed over the years. This seminar will go down in the annuls of NLP history.
2001